A modern relationship?

A couple of years ago, I took a correspondence course on "How to write historical fiction". One of my fellow students, Magnus R Lindgren, has now published, not a historical fiction (although he tells me it will come) but two books on poetry. Far longer than I have come myself.

Magnus R Lindgren can call himself writer, poet, copywriter and teacher, and he also has a diploma in creative writing. His poetry debut, "Om det inte hänt hade jag inte blivit" (If nothing had happening I would not have been) is a reflection on the changes in life and the search for oneself.

In "Detta privata" (This private) he continues with the same theme. He uses Lydia Stille as a co-writer, but she is actually his muse (a character from The Secret Game by Hjalmar Söderberg), an inspiration for his writing. Each chapter starts with a poem and thoughts on the difficulty to enter into a new relationship. Especially, when you are divorced and a little bit older and wiser? The story is written in the form of a facebook/messenger conversation between a man and a woman who has just met on-line.

Then, the day comes when they meet in real life. After several weeks of daily contacts on-line, they do feel that they know each other. Even if their meetings turn out pretty well, both of them are afraid to let go. An insecurity of one's own ability to love, the ability of the other to love. To meet in real life turns out to be more difficult than to meet on-line. This is shown in the introductory short story for each chapter, which contains the man's thoughts when they do meet. The real life meetings show the insecurity he feels. The Messenger conversations, on the contrary, are more secure.

It is a book for reflection. Not only over relationships, but also on the modern society in which we live. Do we have two lives? One on-line and one real life? If so, which one do we feel most comfortable in? The book is often spot on. Maybe it is easier today to "meet" and speak on-line. Will the physical meeting be too realistic? While on-line, using text rather than speech, might give us a feeling that we are within the pages of a novel, that is, it is not real. Does a good artificial contact, exclude a good realistic one?

Lindgren has written a modern short story on relationships on-line. It is beautiful and warm, and point towards many of the problems with relationships today. Here are two persons with more or less the same need for closeness and comfort. The obstacles though seem to be overwhelming, especially as concerns the anxiety to get hurt again. Will this relationship last? Is it worth the effort to give in to your feelings? Does one dare to let go and enter a new relationship unconditionally?

It is a thought provoking little book, well worth a read and to reflect over. It opens up for many interpretations, and this is just one of them.